Courtly Love Page 6

  Now Serena sighed and sat back on her heels. She had decided to weed the garden before the heat became too bad and she glanced behind her to see how Alan was faring. Oblivious to everything, he was working his way down the rows of carrots, taking great care to uproot any offending growth that would deny the carrots their share of the water. With each day that passed Serena grew more fond of the lad, and she found herself longing more and more for her own children and a husband who would love both them and her. And the deeper that longing grew the greater grew the desperation that she would have neither. Serena was seized by a sudden jealousy of the woman Gyles had lain with and given a child. Had it been within her power, Serena would have made Alan her own, but only Gyles could do that and she dared not approach him on the subject. Only the king could legitimatize Alan, and then only if Gyles petitioned him to do so. Well, perhaps Gyles had some other plan for his son. Serena desperately hoped so, for she often caught herself thinking of Alan as if he were her own son.

  Sparkling blue eyes squinted upward to study the sky. Not a cloud in sight and the afternoon promised to be scorching. Serena lifted the heavy mass of her sun-lightened hair from her neck and rose to her feet. She did not want to spend the rest of the day back in her chambers, alone with her thoughts.

  "Alan, would you like to go with me to the pond?"

  "Now?" Alan looked dubiously at the rows of carrots.

  "The carrots won't die, you can finish weeding tomorrow. Go inside and ask Nellwyn to fix us a basket for lunch. I'll get a horse from the stable."

  As the pair cantered away from the castle, Serena was blissfully unaware of the rider approaching the castle from the opposite direction. Alan was seated in front of her, so the knight saw only Serena's back, as he spurred his horse on faster. The horse's hooves clattered in the courtyard and brought a groom out of the stable. He caught the reins that were thrown to him and was about to bid good morrow to the rider but the words died unspoken before the harsh look in the rider's green eyes.

  "Who saddled a steed for Lady Serena?" Gyles shouted the words.

  The groom took a step backward and stammered, " T-'twas I, m'lord."

  "Why did you not accompany her? I left orders that none of the women should ride alone!"

  "B-but Lady Serena never allows a groom to go with her, m'lord. Every groom we did send after her, she promptly lost, so after a while we just gave up."

  "You mean to tell me that none of the men can track one small chit of a girl?" Gyles advanced upon the groom who backed nervously away and swallowed convulsively. "Bah! I am surrounded by fools!" He snatched the reins from the groom and remounted. "I'll deal with you upon my return!"

  Serena chewed on a piece of bread smothered with honey as she watched Alan play in the shallow water. The boy was trying diligently to swim, but he succeeded only in getting water in his nose and mouth as he sank beneath the surface of the pond. When he regained his feet for the third time he glared at Serena and splashed from the pond to throw himself on the bank.

  "You promised!" Alan said reproachfully.

  Serena smiled. "I said I would teach you to swim only if you waited a while after you had eaten. You went in the water far too soon."

  Alan's face crumpled as tears threatened. "I'm sorry, Serena."

  Serena's tender nature could not bear to see the child in tears and she relented. After all, Alan was just a boy and he had little enough to look forward to at Camden. "Do you promise never to do this again?"

  At his eager nod, Serena rose and pulled off her gown. Clad only in her thin undergarment, Serena scooped Alan up into her arms and waded into the water. Setting him in the shallows, she began her instruction. "The first thing you must learn to do is float: Lie back across my arms—don't be afraid, I won't let you sink. Now put your arms straight out. That's right, you're doing fine. Now I'm going to take my arms away, so keep your back straight and your arms out. Good, good!" Gradually she withdrew one arm, and when Alan had adjusted to that, Serena drew back her other arm. The lack of support frightened Alan; he forgot all Serena's instructions and began to thrash wildly as he sank beneath the surface of the water. Hastily, Serena bent down and pulled Alan upward, but not before he had lowered the water level by several mouthfuls. Alan's arms fastened themselves around Serena's neck, soaking her thoroughly, as he gasped and choked.

  "You must try again, Alan."

  "N-no!" Alan sobbed and tightened his arms.

  "If you don't, you will never learn, Alan. I know 'tis frightening, but as long as I am here, nothing will harm you. You're not hurt are you?" Alan shook his head. "You see? Swallowing a little water won't hurt you," Serena chided. "Now, let go of me, and we'll try again. On your back, arms strai—" A twig snapped, and Serena snatched Alan back to her as she turned toward the bank.

  Gyles sat astride his horse, his green-eyed gaze pinning Serena with its intensity. As he watched her, Serena's expression changed from one of fright to relief. She lowered Alan back into the water and smiled up at Gyles, unaware of the fact that her garment clung damply to her body, leaving little of its assets to his imagination. A tightening began in Gyles's groin and he shifted on the saddle to relieve his discomfort. The movement didn't help and the sensation grew stronger, while he gazed at Serena, forcibly reminding him of his monkish abstinence the past months. The reminder served to heighten his already flaming anger, and Serena was a convenient outlet. She noticed the darkening of Gyles's features, but bent upon her new strategy, she deliberately ignored it and waded slowly toward the bank. Several tendrils of hair had escaped the knot on the top of her head and they curled willfully around her face, as the sun struck the gold in her hair. Gyles found himself momentarily dazzled by her appearance. For an instant, Gyles was reminded of the fairy tales he had been told as a child about a water nymph rising from a lake, incredibly beautiful, incredibly delicate. Gyles shook himself mentally; now his mind was betraying him as well as his body. But the way Serena walked toward him, her hips swaying ever so slightly, and stood beside his mount gently stroking the horse's neck. Gyles had an unobstructed view of the delicate swell of her breasts, could see the nipples puckered from the cool water.

  Serena noted where her husband's gaze had traveled and smiled. "Welcome, m'lord, I did not think anyone knew of this place save Alan and myself. Have you eaten? There is meat and bread and a flagon of wine left if you hunger. Pray dismount, m'lord. I fear Alan has persuaded me to teach him to swim, but I am sure you will make a far better tutor than I. Alan and I—"

  "I have more important business to attend to than teaching my son to swim or listening to my simple-minded wife's empty chattering. You were told not to ride without a groom, yet you have deliberately disobeyed my order! I cannot spare the time to track you all over the countryside! Henceforth, when you ride you will take a groom or you shall not ride at all! Does that make any sense in that empty head of yours, m'lady?"

  Serena ground her teeth in mute anger. She would not allow herself to be provoked into an argument! "I am sorry if I have displeased you, m'lord, 'tis only that I sought a place where Alan and I might be free from prying eyes and sharp tongues." Serena spoke quietly and kept her eyes downcast, so Gyles could not see the flashing anger in them. "Since you so command, I shall bring a groom along whenever Alan and I decide to swim. We will not venture forth alone again."

  Gyles could have roared in sheer frustration. The last thing he wanted was his wife exposed as she was now to any man she would arbitrarily pick to accompany her! Did she have so little common sense? Or was it possible that since he hadn't consummated their marriage, Serena had decided to take a lover—any lover?

  Serena's changed attitude these past weeks had not escaped Gyles's notice, and he had wondered at the way she so boldly flaunted herself oeneath his gaze. Gyles's knights had taken note of the change as well, and his temper flared whenever he chanced to intercept the admiring glances and compliments that were directed at Serena. Serena herself appeared totally unaware of this
as she continued to chat with the knights and laugh at their rough jests. There was little Gyles could do to discourage Serena's behavior short of forbidding her to leave her chamber, and that action would make Gyles the brunt of many a derisive comment. But he would see to it that she welcomed no other man to her bed.

  Visions of Serena's delicate body being invaded by a common servant swirled through Gyles's mind. He could picture all too well rough hands touching that smooth flesh, a calloused hand reaching upward to cup a small breast, Serena's thighs being brutally parted as she thrashed beneath a gigantic, hairy body....

  "M'lord?"

  Gyles wrenched himself free from his imaginings to find Serena gazing up at him questioningly. Of their own volition, his hands had clenched themselves into fists and Gyles's face had contorted into an angry mask. Even the bravest of his men would have quailed in the face of his rage, but Serena looked at him quite calmly. Why wasn't she shrinking from him in fear, begging his forgiveness for what he knew she was planning? Slut! Whore! For all her pretended affection for Alan, Serena was no different than the others. He would see her game foiled—take a lover would she! When he finally regained enough control to speak, Gyles's tone should have frozen Serena where she stood.

  "When you desire to ride, Lady Serena, tell me, and I shall accompany you," he said tersely. " Tis not my wish that you should brazenly display yourself to every man of Camden like a strumpet displays her wares—no matter how much you would enjoy doing so."

  Serena gave Gyles an innocent smile. "Your pardon, rtflord, I meant only to obey your wishes, not upset you." Her satisfaction deepened as Gyles's jaw began to work. He might not want her as his wife, but Gyles was not about to allow any man to encroach on one of his possessions; that much Serena had known and played upon. And it had worked—far better than she could have hoped for, in fact. Serena let his biting words pass; Gyles was a proud, arrogant man and for some reason she could not fathom, he seemed to have a violent dislike of women—especially her. Gyles still remained astride his horse, anxious, it appeared, to be off. But Serena hadn't finished with him yet. Being sure to keep her eyes demurely lowered, she said, "May Alan and I complete our swim, m'lord? I fear the day is far too warm for me, and I would enjoy passing the afternoon here."

  Alan joined Serena with his plea to be allowed to stay, and groaning inwardly, Gyles agreed. His self-control was most sorely tried by Serena's appearance and he could foresee nothing but frustration for the remainder of the day. Nevertheless, he dismounted and seated himself on the blanket Serena had brought and watched as Alan's instruction continued. As the sound of their laughter rang clearly over the water and onto the bank, Gyles felt suddenly excluded from their fun—and this exclusion brought an unfamiliar pang to his heart. Serena had momentarily halted Alan's lesson, and the two of them capered in the pond, splashing each other with water, while Alan tried futilely to catch hold of Serena's leg to drag her beneath the water. Laughing, Serena eluded Alan and swam farther out into the pond where Alan knew he could not follow.

  "Not fair, Serena, not fair!" Alan wailed. He turned to Gyles in mute appeal.

  Unhappy with his role of spectator, Gyles sprang to his feet and stripped to his loincloth. Serena stopped swimming and trod the water as she watched Gyles bend down and whisper to Alan. The boy nodded in vigorous agreement and then Gyles began to swim toward Serena. As Serena realized Gyles's intent, she gave a small shriek and she heard Alan laugh. Watching Gyles, Serena knew she could not hope to reach the opposite bank, for he was by far the faster swimmer, but there was the chance she could avoid him. Taking a deep breath, Serena sank beneath the surface and struck out at an angle that would carry her off to Gyles's right. She swam until she was sure her lungs would burst before she surfaced. Serena sucked in several deep breaths of air before her ankle was seized in a vise-like grip and she felt herself being pulled downward. Frantically her arms flailed about her and her hand made contact with Gyles's head. Serena's fingers tangled themselves in his hair and she gave a vicious tug. Gyles's hold loosened for an instant, and Serena kicked her foot free and struck out with her other foot, which made contact with Gyles's chest. She shot upward. When Gyles surfaced beside her, Serena was angry enough to give him a thorough dunking, but seeing the carefree grin on his face, she could do nothing but laugh back at him.

  For his part, Gyles felt more light-hearted and younger than he could remember. His anger with Serena for her imagined betrayal of him dissolved, as her blue eyes sparkled at him. How could any man—least of all himself—resist her teasing look? Gyles made as if to push Serena back into the depths of the pond, but out of sheer self-preservation, Serena wrapped her arms around Gyles's neck, so that if she went under, so did he. Gyles relented and instead playfully splashed a light spray of water against her cheek.

  "You nearly drowned me." Serena laughed.

  "I? Who was it that nearly sent me to the bottom of the pool? Nay, Serena, I think 'tis I who was nearly drowned." He felt Serena's arms slip from his neck and resisted the overpowering urge to pull her back against him. His world seemed lighter somehow—it was comfortable here with his wife and son, with none of the usual bitter undertones that were common at the castle. Gyles watched Serena floating beside him, her gold-streaked hair fanned out in the water around her. Gyles recalled his earlier mental accusations against his wife and wondered at them. Did he really believe that Serena sought to betray him? No, that was not possible. Although Gyles knew little enough about Serena, he did know that honor and faith were highly important to her. Serena would not break the sacred vows she had taken, for she would not shame herself in that manner. For all the harsh treatment and insults she had endured at Camden, Serena had not reviled him; had not, in fact, even spoken to him about the injuries done her—especially by Beda.

  That thought brought a frown to Gyles's face. Serena had been horrified and sickened when she learned about them—and Gyles had to admit he could not blame her. Had Serena forgotten? Or had she chosen simply to ignore the facts? Either way, Serena had never thrown it in his face or questioned him about it. She seemed quite willing to be his wife if he so desired, but by no means was she forcing a decision upon him. Serena was unfailingly polite whenever they met—a most welcome respite from Beda who alternately threatened and cajoled in the misguided hope that Gyles would return to her bed. Finally, aggravated beyond his endurance, Gyles had taken to bolting his side of the door that joined their chambers. At the time Gyles had thought that if Serena lay behind that door he would have it torn from its hinges instead.

  Serena paddled back to Gyles and wondered at the frown that had replaced his smile of a few moments before. She cast a glance at the bank to assure herself that Alan was out of the water, and then turned back to Gyles. His eyes rivaled the leaves above in their greenness, and his skin had turned to a deep bronze during these summer days. Serena had often watched as he and his men held practice sessions with their weapons. Now up close, she could see the firm, rippling muscles of his arms and shoulders, which before she had seen only from a distance. Serena had little enough to judge by, but she knew instinctively that Gyles was indeed a magnificently built man. She had no difficulty understanding why—if Bryan had not been lying—the women at court found him so appealing. What would happen if she went to him now and placed a gentle kiss upon his lips? Would he put her from him? Or would Gyles take her in his arms and whisper the endearments she yearned to hear from his lips? There were so many unanswered questions.

  Gyles was looking at her and smiling. At least he seemed to have removed the curtain from between them, and that was a start, Serena told herself hopefully.

  "You look pensive, Serena. Does something trouble you?" Gyles's voice was soft and low, with a gentle note that Serena had never heard before. He allowed so little tenderness to touch his life, she thought sadly.

  "No, m'lord," she answered quietly. Then she smiled teasingly. " Tis only that I grow weary and must beg your leave to return to shore, for i
f I do not, I fear you shall be made a widower."

  Gyles laughed, and stretching out one arm, caught her to him. "Then shall I ferry you back, m'lady? In truth, 'twould not be a difficult task, for I think you weigh little more than Alan."

  The moment was precious and Serena was loathe to let it go, so she lay passively against Gyles's chest and let him bear both their weights. Gyles seemed to be of the same mind, and Serena could hear the steady beat of his heart in her ear. Hesitantly, she raised one hand up over the dark mat of hair on his chest until her arm was around his neck. The water sparkled as if inlaid with jewels, the wind rustled softly through the trees and time hung suspended for them—trapped around their bodies as they lightly touched, drifted apart, and came together again. From the woods came the trilling of a bird, the only sound that broke their splendid isolation. Both felt the need to speak: Gyles to refute his earlier angry words, and Serena to tell of the strange, new emotion that she had discovered in her heart. But neither could find the words, and instead they held tightly to each other, expressing their thoughts in unspoken communication.

  Eventually, it was Serena who broke away and smiled shakily at Gyles, whose face wore a puzzled expression. "We ... we must go, m'lord. 'Tis late, and there is the joust tomorrow and the guests."

  Gyles nodded, not trusting his voice, for he, too, had been inwardly shaken by their contact. Something about this girl stirred the very depths of his soul, and it was not just desire. He had had this feeling before: when they were arguing; the day they had discussed Alan; and especially during the long days and nights he had kept his vigil by Serena's bedside and feared—yes, Gyles could admit that much to himself—feared for her life. He drew a deep breath and put a teasing note in his voice. "I shall race you to the shore, Serena. Are you game? You do swim very well for a woman, but.. ." He allowed his voice to trail off.

  Serena rose to the bait. "A challenge? But, m'lord, you must make the contest more interesting."